Category Archives: Religion

Silly Iranians, a Politicized End of Ramadan, and the Age of Aquarius……….

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The Jeddah Astronomy Society’s mistake in sighting of the new moon in Saudi Arabia has angered the many Muslim nations who followed suit and pronounced Tuesday as Eid al-Fitr wrongly.
The society had said that people actually saw the planet Saturn and not the crescent moon that marks the beginning of the Islamic month of Shawwal. Hatem Auda, director of the National Institute for Astronomical and Geophysical Research, had said that astronomical calculations by scientists of the institute noted that the first day of the Eid was Wednesday, August 31, making Tuesday, August 30 the last day of Ramadan for the Hijri year of 1432. Various news agencies such as Al-Arabiya and Aljazeera have also reported that the planet Saturn has been mistaken for the Hilal (crescent moon), and this means that what was announced as the first day of Eid al-Fitr was supposed to be a day of fasting, rather than celebrations…………Thus, those Muslim nations who have followed the Saudi suit as usual and celebrated the last Tuesday as Eid al-Fitr are now angry with the Saudis as Eid al-Fitr is the biggest eve for the worldwide Muslim community………..Fars News Agency

All this talk of the moon, Saturn, Jovian planets, Terrestrial planets, and the Age of Aquarius is meaningless to most people. I think the Iranians are being silly here, nearly childish. They are politicizing the end of Ramadan and beginning of Eid al-Fitr. I don’t know if the Saudis made a mistake or not, but I can tell an Iranian attempt to score political points. The mullahs ought to lighten up.
Cheers
mhg



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Ramadan on the Gulf: Potentates Potentate-ing, Shaikh-ing it………….

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UAE President His Highness Shaikh Khalifa Bin Zayed Al Nahyan received His Highness Shaikh Mohammad Bin Rashid Al Maktoum, Vice-President and Prime Minister of the UAE and Ruler of Dubai, in the presence of General Shaikh Mohammad Bin Zayed Al Nahyan, Abu Dhabi Crown Prince and Deputy Supreme Commander of the UAE Armed Forces, at the Rawda Palace in Al Ain on Tuesday evening. The President also received Their Highnesses the Supreme Council Members and Rulers of the Emirates, Dr Shaikh Sultan Bin Mohammad Al Qasimi of Sharjah, Shaikh Saud Bin Rashid Al Mualla of Umm Al Quwain, Shaikh Hamad Bin Mohammad Al Sharqi of Fujairah, and Shaikh Saud Bin Saqr Al Qasimi of Ras Al Khaimah, and Shaikh Humaid Bin Rashid Al Nuaimi of Ajman who offered their greetings on the occasion of Ramadan. Shaikh Khalifa also received Shaikh Hamdan Bin Mohammad Bin Rashid Al Maktoum, Dubai’s Crown Prince, Shaikh Hamdan Bin Rashid Al Maktoum, Deputy Ruler of Dubai and Minister of Finance, Shaikh Sultan Bin Sultan Al Qasimi, Crown Prince and Deputy Ruler of Sharjah, Shaikh Abdullah Bin Salem Bin Sultan Al Qasimi, Deputy Ruler of Sharjah, Shaikh Ammar Bin Humaid Al Nuaimi, Crown Prince of Ajman, Shaikh Mohammad Bin Hamad Bin Mohammad Al Shatqi, Crown Prince of Fujairah, Shaikh Rashid Bin Saud Bin Rashid Al Mualla, Crown Prince of Umm Al Quwain, Shaikh Saud Bin Rashid Al Mualla, Deputy Ruler of Umm Al Quwain, and Shaikh Mohammad Bin Saud Bin Saqr Al Qasimi, Crown Prince of Ras Al Khaimah. The reception was also attended by Shaikh Saif Bin Zayed Al Nahyan, Deputy Prime Minister and Minister of Interior, Shaikh Mansour Bin Zayed Al Nahyan, Deputy Prime Minister and Minister of Presidential Affairs, Shaikh Abdullah Bin Zayed Al Nahyan, Foreign Minister, other Shaikhs, Ministers, Executive Council Members, and senior officials. Shaikh Khalifa hosted an iftar banquet in honour of his guests…………..Gulf News

Just a huge bunch of potentates doing what potentates do: that would be potentate-ing. In case you were interested in such activities.
Cheers
mhg




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A Saudi and his Jinn and his Hairy Exorcists: Try to Beat that, Mr. Ripley………….

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A Saudi man is believed to have been gripped by jinn (ghosts) during a picnic with his friends in a valley which is reputed to be haunted. But he was later treated in an exorcist-style session by the Gulf Kingdom’s religious police. The unnamed man and seven friends from the western town of Makkah were vacationing in the nearby Taif city when they decided to descend into Wadi Al-Amak (the deep abyss) despite warnings by local people. After a short evening trip in the valley, the colour of the man’s began to change and his behavior became aggressive before he lost balance and fell down. When his friends tried to talk to him, he shouted and pushed them away while his eyes were fixed at an area deep in the valley. “Friends then overpowered him and washed his face with cold water…it was clear the man was haunted by a jinn,” Sabq Arabic language daily said. “They then decided to carry him back to town…they were told that the valley is haunted and that there were two similar cases in the past.” The paper said the man was taken to the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice, the most influential Islamic law-enforcement authority in the conservative Moslem Gulf nation. “The Commission brought experts in such cases and subjected the man to a session of Koran recitation and incense burning until the jinn was forced to get out of the man through his hand………

This guy’s friends first waterboarded him (splashed water on his face, my eye). Then they handed him to the religious police (Commission for the Promotion of Vice) who may cure him or they may decide to send him to trial for consorting with jinns (genies) outside legal marriage. An extramarital affair with a jinn (genie) could get a man a beheading sentence in Saudi Arabia. In end it seems like they smoked the jinn out of the man through the stink of cheap incense, or maybe the man came down from his “high” as a result.
I like that part about the jinn “getting out of the man through his hand”. Could it mean the man gave the religious police exorcists the proverbial middle finger, flipped them the birdie, “made a gesture” as polite Brits would say, and they misunderstood? Or, better yet, maybe the Jinn (Genie) gave them its own middle finger.
(I am beginning that a lot goes on in Taif, Saudi Arabia, a lot more than meets the eye).
Cheers
mhg




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The Real Battle for Iran and Arabia: Tribe and Nation and Islam……….

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The people of the ancient Persian Empire, which in 500 BC stretched from the Indus as far as Libya and the Black Sea, are believed to have celebrated the Persian New Year festival at Persepolis with their ruler. In recent years, modern Iranian families have also started to gather here to celebrate Nowruz, the festival that marks the start of spring, camping on the roadside for miles around. Some 100,000 people visit Persepolis every year. Twenty years ago it was around 8,000…….. “My son,” Darius wrote in his testament, “pray always to God, but never force anyone to follow your faith. Always bear in mind that all people should be free and may follow their own faith and conviction.”……. However, what is more significant than the bad economic situation is the lack of exciting new ideas, the inability of the clerical nomenklatura to propose new objectives, ones for which people would be prepared to be patient and make sacrifices. Instead, the orthodoxy is fighting a paralysing battle to maintain its hard-won position. One man has realised how dangerous this intellectual wasteland could be for the regime, and he has now become one of the figures most hated and feared by the conservatives: Esfandiar Rahim Mashaei, President Ahmadinejad’s friend and chief of staff. Should a theocracy, of all forms of government, be permitted to rely solely on practical power – in this case, armed troops and the secret service – and do without spirituality and visions for the future? At present, the Green Movement is seen as representing people’s dreams of a better future, and the Sufis, who are also combated by the orthodoxy, as the locus of spirituality. Mashaei is feeling his way towards filling the ideological gap with a mixture of rationality and re-ideologisation. He has declared political Islam to be obsolete and its most important symbol, the hijab or veiling of the female body, to be a woman’s free decision. Statements like these are taboo……….

This is not just an Iranian issue, this dichotomy between ethnicity/nationalism and Islam. Islamists across the Middle East have been pushing the idea that “national” identity does not matter, that Islam rules supreme. It is almost a throwback to the European pre-nationalism days a few centuries ago. Yet in reality people identify themselves by other things first: nation, ethnicity, even tribe (as in Africa and Saudi Arabia). In some ‘special’ places like Lebanon people are identified by their faith and sect: Shi’a, Sunni, Maronite, Orthodox, Armenian, etc. Yet there are so many sects that people always identify themselves as Lebanese in the end, especially vis-à-vis the outside world. The ongoing Arab uprisings, from North Africa to the Gulf have tended to strengthen this “national” identity: be it Tunisian, Egyptian, Syrian, Bahraini, etc or just “Arab”. The revolutions of 2011 are called “Arab” revolutions all across the region, never the “Islamic” revolutions. The Iranian mullahs and Arab Salafis (of the Saudi school of thought) have tried to push an Islamic “identity” on the uprisings, each for their own purposes, but it is not working.
Iranians will always be Iranians first and Muslims (or Zaroastrians or Christians) afterwards. Egyptians will always be Egyptians first and Muslims or Copts afterwards. Saudis, somewhat like the Lebanese, are different: they still identify themselves with their individual tribes first, before being “Saudi” or even “Arab” or Muslim. Even the Taliban consider themselves Pushtun first, then Afghans, (or Pakistani?), then Muslims. Most, nay all, Salafis of the Gulf and Arabian Peninsula identify themselves with their tribes first, even as they outwardly push an “Islamist” agenda.
The issue may look somewhat different in Europe, with the growing racism and the difficulties of assimilation and the mosque becoming a spiritual and social refuge in “exile”. Besides, to use a cliche, all Muslims may look the same to many Europeans.
Cheers
mhg




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Salafis of the Gulf: Saudi Paymasters, and a Kosher Homey in Abbottabad……..

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Note that these villages are not engaging in any criminal activities. They are unarmed civilians who are being wantonly attacked by state security forces simply on the basis that the people are Shia and therefore deemed by the Sunni elite rulers to be supportive of anti-government (pro-democracy) movement, which in itself is not illegal and is supposedly a right that is permitted by Bahrain’s signatory to international laws, that is, the right to have political opinions. Note also that, according to my contacts, the security personnel are mainly Saudi or from Yemen, Syria, Jordan. These personnel are predominantly Sunni and loyal to the regime. That is why they have been recruited by the regime. The police and army personnel are extremely hostile to Shia people out of deep sectarian phobia. This is especially true of the Saudis who are typically Wahhabis, the kind of extreme Islamism that Saudi rulers and Al Qaeda espouses. Wahhabis see it almost as a religious duty to crush Shias. We saw the same phobia in Iraq where Shia mosques were mostly attacked by bombers. The effective consent that the West has given the Bahraini rulers to crackdown on their people means the West is colluding with some of the most repressive regimes in the Middle East to crush pro-democracy people in Bahrain……

Salafis have been the strongest supporters of the campaign to crush the uprising for equality and democracy in Bahrain. They are strong supporters of any campaign by regimes in the Gulf GCC, or other countries, against any true democratic movement that supports free speech. Even as they themselves are often used by their Saudi paymasters to disrupt other regimes in their home Gulf countries, like in my own hometown, under the pretense of demanding more democracy. Salafis never ever believe in democracy and free speech: sometimes they use the others’ demands for freedom but only to serve their and their masters’ purposes.
Salafis all across the Gulf and indeed across the Middle East, are coreligionists and ideological mates of al-Qaeda. They consider the al-Qaeda people basically ‘kosher’ homeys who may have erred and gone astray against the ruling al-Saud dynasty (apparently no too astray: they still get all the money they need for their terrorist activities). Some of these Salafis in the Gulf, including in my hometown, have penned articles beseeching Bin Laden to return to the fold, come in from the cold, enjoy the joys of the absolute tribal monarchy which spawned him and his movement. That was before Abbottabad (for some reason Abbottabad always reminds me of Lou Costello).
Cheers
mhg




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Rabbinical Court: Look who Almost Got Stoned in Israel………

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A Jerusalem rabbinical court condemned to death by stoning a dog it suspects is the reincarnation of a secular lawyer who insulted the court’s judges 20 years ago, Ynet website reported Friday. According to Ynet, the large dog made its way into the Monetary Affairs Court in the ultra-Orthodox Jewish neighbourhood of Mea Shearim in Jerusalem, frightening judges and plaintiffs. Despite attempts to drive the dog out of the court, the hound refused to leave the premises. One of the sitting judges then recalled a curse the court had passed down upon a secular lawyer who had insulted the judges two decades previously. Their preferred divine retribution was for the lawyer’s spirit to move into the body of a dog, an animal considered impure by traditional Judaism. Clearly still offended, one of the judges sentenced the animal to death by stoning by local children. The canine target, however, managed to escape………

As far as I know all cases of being stoned in Israel have been of the, well, weedy, greeny, cannabis kind, or worse (a value judgment here). This is a first sentence of actual stoning, with real rocks. This dog missed an opportunity to become a cause célèbre, a la poor Sakinah Ashtiani of Iran.
Occasionally some of these Jewish rabbis act as if totally stoned out of their minds, just like many Muslim ones, almost. Some Muslim clerics have issued fatwas for the elimination of man’s best friend, but none has recommended that they be stoned. As far as I know.
Before anyone gets the wrong idea, Christians in Europe have for centuries sentenced and executed innocent four-legged animals on various suspicions. They probably don’t do it anymore.
Cheers
mhg




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Sir Thomas More Al Shaikh, Saint Thomas Becket of Al-Azhar………..

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Thomas Becket was appointed Archbishop of Canterbury by his close friend King Henry II. Becket took his job in the church seriously and would not side with the king on many issues, when he thought the king was wrong. He was murdered in 1170, possibly with the encouragement of the king.
Sir Thomas More was appointed Lord Chancellor by King Henry VIII with the apparent assumption that he would do the king’s bidding against the Catholic Church. More took his job seriously: he could not in good conscious side with the king who had raised him so high and appointed him chancellor. Sir Thomas was tried for treason and beheaded in 1535, as he no doubt expected.

Shaikh A Al Al Shaikh, Mufti of Saudi Arabia, head of its Commission of High Religious Ulema (clergy). He would never disagree with the king or any of the princes. He would, and has, issued fatwas banning any criticism and opposition to the king, any king. His most famous fatwa was issued last March, banning any protests against the government, calling them ‘acts against Islam’. The excited Saudi government published two million copies of his fatwa and distributed them across the country. It never made the list of N Y Time or Amazon bestsellers. Perhaps if Shaikh Al Al Shaikh could start traveling around the world, signing copies of his fatwa at Border’s and Barnes & Noble.
Shaikh Ahmed al-Tayeb. Appointed two years ago by Hosni Mubarak as head of al-Azhar and its chief Mufti. He was a member of Mubarak’s ruling party at the time. On his first few months as Mufti he legalized Saudi-style temporary part-time marriages in Egypt (the mesyar or mesayar), allowing funny summer vacation marriages between elderly Saudis and poor Egyptian girls. Immediately after that he announced to Saudi media that he will be watching carefully for Shi’a expansion in al-Azhar and work to stop it, wtf that means. He opined against the Egyptian Revolution that started on January 25, 2011, but after Mubarak fell he changed him mind.
Cheers
mhg




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Al-Qaeda Finances: Have Money, Will Travel………

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This puts people like Abd al-Hamid al-Mujil in an uncomfortable position. Described by fellow jihadists as the “million-dollar man” for his successful fundraising on behalf of al Qaeda and other jihadi groups, Mujil directed the office of the International Islamic Relief Organization (IIRO), a charity in the Eastern Province of Saudi Arabia. Both he and the IIRO office he headed were designated as terrorist entities by the U.S. Treasury Department in 2006. But even if being “named and shamed” forced Mujil out of the terror-finance business, there are many others just like him. Just this week, David Cohen, the head of the Treasury Department’s Terrorism and Financial Intelligence branch told CNN that major donors from the Gulf states remain the key sources of funding for the al Qaeda core. There are no doubt dozens of radical funders now worrying that their names, bank accounts, or addresses will comes up in bin Laden’s spreadsheets — or “pocket litter” — and for good reason.……..

I have always argued that all these terrorist operations from Iraq to Pakistan must cost a lot of money. More money than the locals could provide. I have always written here that following the money trail from Iraq or Pakistan or Yemen will lead so a huge field of petroleum, an oil well. This is part of someone’s ‘foreign policy’, at least the Iraq part is. Bring pressure on Iraq by sending suicide terrorists across the border and finance them (the money is peanuts for the deep pocketed princes). Bring pressure on Pakistan and others the same way. Meanwhile, the money and the Salafi fatwas will keep the bombers away from the home front. As for the Western allies, and the other Arabs who fall victim? Oh, well, there is such a thing as collateral damage.
Cheers
mhg




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An Iranian Exorcist, Saudi Muftis, Egyptian Abdelwahhab…………….

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Twenty-five close collaborators and supporters of Iran’s president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and his influential Chief of Staff, Esfandyar Rahim Mashai, have been arrested, allegedly including “exorcist” or “djinn catcher” Abbas Ghaffari. Many speculate this is due to a quarrel between Ahmadinejad and the Islamic Republic’s supreme leader, Ali Khamenei over the resignation of Iran’s minister of intelligence. Last week, Morteza Nabavi, a conservative politician, accused [fa] team Ahmadinejad of thinking they were being empowered by djinns or genies. In a cabinet meeting on Sunday 8 May, 2011, Ahmadinejad responded by dismissing [fa] the notion that he has exorcists in his government as a joke. You can watch the video here [fa]……..

As if he has not had enough quarrels, Ahamadinejad is reported to have lost other allies, including his indispensable Jinn catcher. Many of us think, erroneously, that only Catholics have Jinn catchers, or exorcists. We all do. What do you think all these official Muftis are? Egypt’s al-Azhar Mufti was appointed by Hosni Mubarak from within his own ruling party, and his job was to chase away any notion that the rule of a dictator may be un-Islamic. He tried to do his job, condemning the revolutionaries before and after January 25. But he has seen the light, apparently. Then there is that other great palace exorcist, the Saudi Mufti Shaikh Al Al Shaikh. He did his best to exorcise the Jinns of revolution and protest from the streets of Riyadh and Jeddah, and he succeeded. Shaikh Al Al Shaikh failed in the Eastern Province, but then these guys (and gals) in Qatif and Dhahran are not supposed to be true Muslims anyway, according the the not-s-secret teachings of Al and his ilk.
One advantage of an exorcist being part of the regimes: he won’t go to prison and get flogged in Iran and he won’t get flogged and beheaded in Saudi Arabia.
(FYI, only for those who are new to my blog: Shaikh Al Al-Shaikh is a direct descendant of Shaikh (a k a Imam) Mohammed Bin Abdulwahhab after whom the term “Wahhabi” was named. He was from the Najd area and should not be confused with the late great Egyptian musician and singer Mohammed Abdelwahhab who was not a Salafi (nor a Shi’a nor a Mthodist). Did I write that there are many Al Al-Shaikhs in various high positions in the Saudi state? Did I also write that I enjoyed the songs of Abdelwahhab, including al-Gondool, Cleopatra, al-Nahr al-Khaled, etc)
Cheers
mhg




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A Bin Laden Doomsday Tape, Renewable Chicks of Paradise………

     
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“When doomsday rears her ugly head again
And even though you voted that awful man
i’ll never refuse your hand
on any given doomsday or the one and only doomsday
Not in all my wildest dreams it never once was seen
that doomsday might fall anywhere near a Tuesday……”
Elvis Perkins

A doomsday tape made by Osama Bin Laden was poised to be released Monday by his Al Qaeda disciples. U.S. officials feared the recording would be akin to a voice from the grave calling for a do-or-die jihad against the West, a final order of a terrorist madman. Just a day after U.S. Navy SEALs raided Bin Laden’s luxury hideout in Pakistan and snuffed him out, media outlets were weighing whether to air a tape that could boost his legacy as a martyr. CNN’s Wolf Blitzer said he was getting bombarded with Twitter messages from viewers pleading with the network not to air Bin Laden’s propaganda. Blitzer’s colleague Anderson Cooper said he sided with those who had no desire to hear from a hater. “Bin Laden a mass murderer who should never be heard from again,” Cooper said Monday……….”

The media is doing its best to fuck up the aftermath of Bin Laden’s death. All this nonsense about a ‘doomsday’ tape that will somehow set the world aflame is pure horse apples. Al-Qaeda terrorists have wanted to set the world aflame for a couple of decades and have mostly failed. What makes these press pundits think that one more tape will inspire the terrorist Salafis to make that one extra push toward the rivers of wine and renewable chicks of paradise? I say release the tape, if it exists, for it will come out anyway sooner rather than later. Unless it has a shot of Osama and Ayman belting out Auld Lang Syne.
Cheers
mhg

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