Volcanoes of Jihad: Disappointed ISIS Caliph Misses Some Hot Dates in Paradise………

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Caliph Abu Bakr Al Baghdadi (a k a Ibrahim Awwad) has just called for “volcanoes of jihad” in an audio message. That was after the Caliph himself reportedly missed a close American volcano last week. It was clear within hours of the reported air raid that the Caliph had survived: they would have announced it quickly and condolences exchanged. We never hide death which is a repayment on a debt that must be repaid. Even the cutthroats among us don’t do that.
He had an appointment with an American bomb that would have transported him to the arms of many comely Houris of renewable virginity (no, not surgical renewal). He would have gone to sipping Mai Tai and Chateau Paradise with dinner by the riverside. A martyr’s life, afterlife.
As it was, he was denied. He was never beamed up to the place he expects to end up in. Which is as well, since many more expect him to end up in the other warmer place where the trident would poke his posterior, herding him southward.
Better luck next time, Abu. Not that it really matters to those Chechens and others you would leave behind………..

Cheers
Mohammed Haider Ghuloum

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