Category Archives: Marriage

Postpartum and Marriage in Arabia: Young Prince Bombs Yemen, Takes New Wife, Goes to Paris……….

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Saudi Arabia’s new young defense minister Prince Mohammad Bin Salman Al Saudi apparently can multi-task. He has drawn the ire of some among the Wahhabi opposition, as well as predictably some senior officers from the ruling family (commoners would not dare express irritation at a royal). The story as told by opposition activists, including Mujtahidd, is as follows:

The prince followed up his trip to Camp David with a quick marriage to a second wife (or maybe a third wife). His first wife, a princess, is going through the after birth period of postpartum when the prince took another wife, another princess/cousin last week, and flew her to a Paris honeymoon. Now what can be more romantic than taking a new wife while your earlier model is struggling with the tough problems of postpartum? Especially if you take the new model to Paris (Abu Bakr Al Samarrai of ISIS, eat your heart out).

Paris is where he and the new bride are: dunno why he did not go to Yemen. So, a new baby, an old wife, and a new wife. Now he is handling a bombing war (on Yemen), a current wife in postpartum complications, and a new wife who God knows how long will last before being traded for a newer model. Plus an elderly father-king surrounded by rival princes: brothers, cousins, minions and all kinds of snake-oil salesmen.

I guess these entitlement people have their own unique problems too……….

    

Cheers
Mohammed Haider Ghuloum                          Follow ArabiaDeserta on Twitter
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Virginity Tests: from Indonesia to Ipanema………

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“Indonesia urged to ban virginity tests for fiancées of officers, female recruits. Indonesian authorities have been urged to cease the “invasive” and “discriminatory” practice of “virginity tests” for female recruits and fiancées of military officers in the country’s armed forces. International military physicians are set to gather in Bali, Indonesia on May 17-22, 2015, to urge the country’s president, Joko Widodo, to stop the practice, according to Human Rights Watch…………….”

Virginity tests aren’t new: the Egyptian military famously used them extensively during the Tahrir Uprising in 2011. But they used them against female protesters whom the military and bureaucracy suspected of being promiscuous and engaged in sex with male protesters. In their minds it made sense: why else would young women come out to face the regime goons and risk life and limb unless it was for sex? That also fits in somehow with the Saudi clerical claims that allowing women to drive cars would end virginity overnight in that country. At least “no more virginity as they know it” ( you can use your imagination and figure it out).

Apparently Indonesian officers are allowed to marry virgins only and the state take the responsibility of ensuring that. No more surprises on the wedding night in Indonesia. There are no doubt other places where this practice is de rigueur, possibly Malaysia.
I tell ya Wahhabism and its, er, practices have spread all over the globe, possibly with the exception of Ipanema.

    

Cheers
Mohammed Haider Ghuloum                          Follow ArabiaDeserta on Twitter
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From Iraq to Lebanon: the Caliph of Mosul Evades a Conjugal Shortage……….

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“A woman detained by Lebanese authorities was not the wife of the Islamic State leader, Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, but the sister of a man convicted of bombings in southern Iraq, Iraq’s interior ministry has said. “The one detained by Lebanese authorities was Saja Abdul Hamid al-Dulaimi, sister of Omar Abdul Hamid al-Dulaimi, who is detained by authorities and sentenced to death for his participation in … explosions,” a ministry spokesman said on Wednesday. “The wives of the terrorist Al-Baghdadi are Asmaa Fawzi Mohammed al-Dulaimi and Esraa Rajab Mahel al-Qaisi, and there is no wife in the name of Saja al-Dulaimi,” he said…………….”

The Salafis apparently like being able to switch partners without missing a ‘beat’. At least some people attach this characteristic to them. That explains the plethora of wives and concubines they prefer to have around. Some bought and paid for, others captured or just kidnapped and considered legitimate war booty. Hence the confusion over the number and identities of the wives of Caliph Abu Bakr Al Baghdadi (a.k.a. Ibrahim Awwad Al Samarrai). The man from Looney Tunes.

All of which does not explains why anyone would think a wife or concubine of a Wahhabi Caliph would travel from Mosul to Beirut. Maybe just a shopping spree to recycle some of the oil money they get from exporting (through the Caliphate of Turkey)? A la the more-established and not-so-nouveau riche Persian Gulf potentates and oligarchs and their women?
Cheers
Mohammed Haider Ghuloum

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Foreign Marriage and Polygamy and the Frustrated Single Wahhabi……..

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“The official said Saudi men have been prohibited from marrying expatriate women from Pakistan, Bangladesh, Chad and Myanmar. According to unofficial statistics, there are about 500,000 women from these four countries currently residing in the Kingdom. Official sources said Morocco has made it conditional for Saudis wishing to marry Moroccan women to provide clean criminal records. The sources said Moroccan authorities also require applicants to provide written consent from his wife if he is already married……….”

Saudi authorities also now require for any citizen wising to marry a Moroccan woman to provide a criminal record of the woman, to prove that she has no dangerous crimes and illegal drugs in her past. The Moroccan, for their part, require that a Saudi man who is already married must provide her approval to his marriage of a second Moroccan wife.

Life is getting tough for sexually repressed and frustrated Saudi men. They are banned by their own government from marrying the nationalities mentioned above, and it has been made hard for them to marry Moroccan women. The Moroccans also have their own requirements. They are also required to get approval of the Wahhabi authorities before they can marry any foreign woman, even if the marriage is done outside the country, even on Mars.

It is a good thing for them that Generalisimo Field Marshal President Al Sisi has not come around to restricting the summer marriages many vacationing Saudi men have with Egyptian women, nor has he cracked down, yet, on dirty older Saudi men marrying underage Egyptian child brides.

Cheers

Mohammed Haider Ghuloum

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How Many Jackasses are Needed at One Wedding?……….

      


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“According to the wedding-trend reporters at the Knot, donkeys at weddings are literal walking icebreakers, beasts that will lighten the burden of socializing. An Arizona company called Haul N Ass Productions has trained them to walk around, distributing beer from saddlebags. They also carry their own carrot snacks. For entirely donkey-themed nuptials, there’s the Donkey Sanctuary in England, which was registered as a wedding venue in 2013. Couples marry in a decorated stable. Two of the participating donkeys are named Mopsy and Zippo. Donkeys are especially popular in Tex-Mex-Southwestern-themed weddings. At this wedding, the donkey wore a floral straw hat and looked pissed off. At this wedding the donkey tried to eat the fancy floral arrangement, which, in his defense, looked like hay…………….”

I am not going to comment. Just do the math. How many jackasses are needed at one wedding? That depends……....
Yet, Since I started again on donkeys (or jackasses if you prefer) in my last post.
Speaking of which (and this is not a comment): a few years ago Arab media reported about a wedding in Damascus (of all places). During the celebrations, the bride decided to sing to her groom as they danced. Unfortunately she picked a silly Egyptian song that was apparently very popular. Its title: I love you, jackass (بحبك يا حمار). That marriage was never consummated.



Cheers
mhg

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