Islamic Chutzpah and Libido: Marital Time-Shares in Arabia, Egypt Bows, A Conjugal Burqa
They, I am not sure who, say that a few years after JFK was assassinated, someone asked China's Chairman Mao what would have happened if Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev had been assassinated instead. They say Mao paused briefly before replying "I don't think that Mr. Onassis would have married Mrs. Khrushchev."
S.O.W. is not N.O.W.
It is almost New Year's, and time for some light stories- unfortunately they all have tragic undertones, but here goes:
Last October the Mufti of Egypt, an appointed Islamic authority who always toes the official line in Arab countries, ruled that the Mesayar marriage, or 'travel marriage' or better yet "marriage on the go" is OK in Egypt. This is a type of marriage that has been common in Saudi Arabia and some other Gulf states- now it has spread to Egypt. It is named so because it started with men who travel a lot and cannot have 'access' to their truly beloved wives for several days. It is like a part-time marriage, with the sole purpose of having sex without being considered a sinner- they are trying to parse words with God, trick Him, but I don't believe He is buying it.
It is like a conjugal time-share. They do not live together, the woman remains with her family or wherever, where the man visits her by arrangement or they can meet elsewhere by arrangement (get the drift?), and she cedes the usual marital rights of a women. The advantage is sex without being flogged, stoned or beheaded (no, the one betwixt the shoulders).
The Egyptian fatwa, as usual, leaves the door open for the 'ruler' to crack down on this in the future, should relations with Saudi Arabia go sour: it says that the ruler can ban this type of marriage if it spreads too much and threatens morality or the more permanent forms of marriage.
This move is decidedly a political bow to the power of the almighty petro-dollar, since most cases of this marriage of convenience now involve poor Egyptian women and tourist men from Saudi Arabia and other Gulf states. An interesting institution that is spreading fast in the New New Middle East...the birth pangs may come nine months later, Madam Secretary.
The move also reflects a strong shift in power away from the traditional Mediterranean, heterogeneous Arab lands and to the oil lands- perhaps that is the New New Middle East.
It is not the act or institution that I find odd- after all these people are adults and can do whatever they want. It is the cynical and twisted way that are used to explain it, to make it fit into the faith, that is breathtaking- call it Islamic- Chutzpah. A good word, Chutzpah, succinct. Too bad we could not coin it before the Jews did- but then we would have had to suffer the Diaspora and pogroms and......, in addition to the likes of Einstein, Oppenheimer, Spielberg and Woody Allen.
I wonder if Sarko has made such a Mesayar arrangement while he spends New Years' in Egypt with his current love Carla.
(More about the other temporary marriage, the Mut'aa, later).
Last October a Saudi man decided to be courageous and look at his wife's face, see her for the very first time. She had been his wife for 30 years, and he had never seen her face. She always wore the burq'a when he was at home. She wore it at all meals and in bed, just as she had kept it on on their wedding night thirty yeas earlier, all night. The man did not know what his family had picked for him, and maybe that was a good thing- especially after so many years: in Arabia, imagination is a great sanctuary from some grim realities.
In this case the woman has left the house and sued for divorce because, she said, her husband has done something gravely sinful- after that first/last look, maybe he thinks so as well.
Another Saudi husband has confided to a media outlet that he has been married for ten years, and has never seen his wife's face, not even while they have their probably decidedly one-sided fun. He did try once to lift the Burq'a, but she threatened to leave and he had to promise never to try it again. Maybe he wanted to make sure he was sleeping with the same woman every night.
I guess that rules out any frenching in the conjugal boudoir.
On the other hand, a Saudi man last Ramadan poked out his wife's eye because she prepared lentil soup for his breakfast meal. Apparently the man prepared the menu for the whole month, but his wife misread the item for that day- and lost one eye for it. The man claimed that he lost control because he hadn't smoked all day (smoking , like food, drink and sex, is not allowed from sunrise to sunset during Ramadan).
Another man has also sued for divorce because he 'caught' his wife watching television alone. He claimed that she was alone in a room with strange men, those men being whoever was on TV at the time: newscasters, singers, actors, Howard Stern, Huckabee, etc. he said that she committed a sin in being alone with all these two-dimensional men.
Perhaps they need a SOW modeled after NOW..
Cheers
mhg
m.h.ghuloum@gmail.com
S.O.W. is not N.O.W.It is almost New Year's, and time for some light stories- unfortunately they all have tragic undertones, but here goes:
Last October the Mufti of Egypt, an appointed Islamic authority who always toes the official line in Arab countries, ruled that the Mesayar marriage, or 'travel marriage' or better yet "marriage on the go" is OK in Egypt. This is a type of marriage that has been common in Saudi Arabia and some other Gulf states- now it has spread to Egypt. It is named so because it started with men who travel a lot and cannot have 'access' to their truly beloved wives for several days. It is like a part-time marriage, with the sole purpose of having sex without being considered a sinner- they are trying to parse words with God, trick Him, but I don't believe He is buying it.
It is like a conjugal time-share. They do not live together, the woman remains with her family or wherever, where the man visits her by arrangement or they can meet elsewhere by arrangement (get the drift?), and she cedes the usual marital rights of a women. The advantage is sex without being flogged, stoned or beheaded (no, the one betwixt the shoulders).
The Egyptian fatwa, as usual, leaves the door open for the 'ruler' to crack down on this in the future, should relations with Saudi Arabia go sour: it says that the ruler can ban this type of marriage if it spreads too much and threatens morality or the more permanent forms of marriage.
This move is decidedly a political bow to the power of the almighty petro-dollar, since most cases of this marriage of convenience now involve poor Egyptian women and tourist men from Saudi Arabia and other Gulf states. An interesting institution that is spreading fast in the New New Middle East...the birth pangs may come nine months later, Madam Secretary.
The move also reflects a strong shift in power away from the traditional Mediterranean, heterogeneous Arab lands and to the oil lands- perhaps that is the New New Middle East.
It is not the act or institution that I find odd- after all these people are adults and can do whatever they want. It is the cynical and twisted way that are used to explain it, to make it fit into the faith, that is breathtaking- call it Islamic- Chutzpah. A good word, Chutzpah, succinct. Too bad we could not coin it before the Jews did- but then we would have had to suffer the Diaspora and pogroms and......, in addition to the likes of Einstein, Oppenheimer, Spielberg and Woody Allen.
I wonder if Sarko has made such a Mesayar arrangement while he spends New Years' in Egypt with his current love Carla.
(More about the other temporary marriage, the Mut'aa, later).
Last October a Saudi man decided to be courageous and look at his wife's face, see her for the very first time. She had been his wife for 30 years, and he had never seen her face. She always wore the burq'a when he was at home. She wore it at all meals and in bed, just as she had kept it on on their wedding night thirty yeas earlier, all night. The man did not know what his family had picked for him, and maybe that was a good thing- especially after so many years: in Arabia, imagination is a great sanctuary from some grim realities.
In this case the woman has left the house and sued for divorce because, she said, her husband has done something gravely sinful- after that first/last look, maybe he thinks so as well.
Another Saudi husband has confided to a media outlet that he has been married for ten years, and has never seen his wife's face, not even while they have their probably decidedly one-sided fun. He did try once to lift the Burq'a, but she threatened to leave and he had to promise never to try it again. Maybe he wanted to make sure he was sleeping with the same woman every night.
I guess that rules out any frenching in the conjugal boudoir.
On the other hand, a Saudi man last Ramadan poked out his wife's eye because she prepared lentil soup for his breakfast meal. Apparently the man prepared the menu for the whole month, but his wife misread the item for that day- and lost one eye for it. The man claimed that he lost control because he hadn't smoked all day (smoking , like food, drink and sex, is not allowed from sunrise to sunset during Ramadan).
Another man has also sued for divorce because he 'caught' his wife watching television alone. He claimed that she was alone in a room with strange men, those men being whoever was on TV at the time: newscasters, singers, actors, Howard Stern, Huckabee, etc. he said that she committed a sin in being alone with all these two-dimensional men.
Perhaps they need a SOW modeled after NOW..
Cheers
mhg
m.h.ghuloum@gmail.com
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